I Know Victoria’s Secret….


Alrighty.

Some of you may remember the “23 Things to Do Before I Turn 24” post.

One of the items on  that list was to be properly sized for and purchase a bra at Victoria’s Secret. This doesn’t seem like a huge deal, but the fact of the matter is, a 42DD is no freakin’ joke. After 38, Victoria’s Secret quits. They just say “Screw you, and your extra-large chest! Go shop somewhere like Lane Bryant!” and it’s a wrap. Although it’s a bit silly, I’ve always had visions of myself purchasing Victoria’s Secret panties, bras, and VS Pink gear. Although I am BEYOND thrilled that these dreams have all become realities, I have a few bones to pick with Vicki.

1. WHY, may I ask, does VS PINK only go to a size Large? And WHY, again, do VS PINK bras stop at like, a C cup? Rude. While I understand that line is geared more towards the college crowd…..college girls have big boobs, hips, and butts too! What the french toast?!?! It is the most annoying thing to shop somewhere, and they don’t carry an XL. Sometimes, a big chest makes or breaks that barrier between L and XL….and your discrimination is most definitely not appreciated!

2.How is that every single size bra your sales associates fit me for, has so much padding that it simply does not fit? She told me I can wear a 38C or a 36D….and I ended up having to buy the bra in a 38 D, because otherwise they were struggling to free themselves from the constraints. Make no mistake…my new convevrtible bra makes me a happy girl….but I had to try on SIX in various sizes OTHER than she fitted me at, to find it.

3. I fit a size L in the PINK line, now. But I am still very angry at you for not carrying the yoga pants in an XL. Say it with me: “BIG hips and thighs.” NOT a happy girl on that one.

4. Now, the regular VS lines carry panties in a size XL. However, there are NO size XL panties in the semi-annual sale bins. What is that all about? How are you going to get me all excited, and then, when I ask one of the girls on the floor, she says “No, we don’t have any XL panties!” and then, she goes on to yell across to someone else, “HEY, (whatever her name was)! So we have any panties in XL for the sale bins?!” and prompts everyone at the cash wrap to look over at me. Sigh…

Whatever, skinny bitches. I know your secret. You discriminate! Maybe I’m being a tad bit dramatic….but come on! Can you imagine how huge of a market they could reach if they invested a little more material and made real sizes?

I’m wearing my new bra as we speak, marvelling at the feeling of my boobs actually being held up for once in quite a while. It was high time I got re-measured….but I must admit, I was trying to avoid this stress! Lol.

I am now the proud owner of a VS PINK Chargers tee (thanks to my bestie!), a VS Incredible convertible bra, and a VS PINK sweater that makes me feel like one of those gorgeously unkempt co-ed looking girls from the ads. I’ve been purchasing VS panties for quite a few months (in size XL, which apparently, is the only size that never goes on sale) now, so I have a ton of those.

Is it strange that I feel more normal now?

Whew. Big weekend ahead! Getting the jeep smogged tomorrow morning, then Costco run for protein shakes. Babysitting Baby Enzo, and then? Heading to the Inland Empire to visit some loved ones and head out for the night for a b’day party! WOOO!

30 Day Challenge post will most likely be up Tuesday, after the photo shoot at Boudoir Divas SD. I am so BEYOND excited for my “sexy” photoshoot!

Hope you all have an amazing weekend!

‘Til Next Time!

XOXO

2 thoughts on “I Know Victoria’s Secret….

  1. cruz2lose says:

    Hahahaha…OMG…this cracked me up! Every time I go into Victoria’s Secret (I am a size 16) those little girls ask me, “Can I help you find a gift?” A gift??? OH HELL NO! I WANT TO SQUEEZE MY FAT ASS INTO SOMETHING SEXY TWIGGY!!! After reading this I now want to go shopping! : )

    ~Cheers!
    Beth

    Like

    • sondrajo says:

      Beth, I literally cracked up reading your comment! Those girls are something ELSE! And when you said Twiggy? Oh….I died!!!! So glad someone understands. And shop on, girl! Shop on!!

      Like

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